Domestic abuse: the key signs and how to spot it early

As part of the national 16 days of activism against gender-based abuse, we are helping Derbyshire spot the signs of domestic abuse. 

Spotting the signs is key to identifying any abuse that may be ongoing, and ensuring victims get the right support they need.

These include:

• Destructive criticism and verbal abuse - shouting/mocking/accusing/name calling/verbally threatening.
• Disrespect: persistently putting you down in front of other people; not listening or responding when you talk; interrupting your telephone calls; taking money from your purse without asking; refusing to help with childcare or housework.
• Breaking trust: lying to you; withholding information from you; being jealous; having other relationships; breaking promises and shared agreements.
• Isolation: monitoring or blocking your telephone calls; telling you where you can and cannot go; preventing you from seeing friends and relatives.
• Harassment: following you; checking up on you; opening your mail; repeatedly checking to see who has telephoned you; embarrassing you in public.
• Threats: making angry gestures; using physical size to intimidate; shouting you down; destroying our possessions; breaking things; punching walls; wielding a knife or a gun; threatening to kill or harm you and the children.
• Physical violence: punching; slapping; hitting; biting; pinching; kicking; pulling hair out; pushing; shoving; burning; strangling.
• Denial: saying the abuse doesn’t happen; saying you caused the abusive behaviour; being gentle and patient in public; crying and begging for forgiveness; saying it will never happen again.

If you are experiencing any of these, support is available.

All reports will be taken seriously and we are committed to listening to victims and their feedback to provide the very best service to victims of domestic abuse. Find out more about how you can report domestic abuse at: Report domestic abuse | Derbyshire Constabulary

If you are worried about someone finding out you have contacted us, we have advice on how to erase related searches from your web history: How to hide this visit from your web history | Derbyshire Constabulary  

However, we understand you may not be ready to make a report, and that is okay. A number of independent organisations across Derbyshire are available to provide specialist support and guidance. The full details and how to get in touch are here: Support organisations for victims of domestic violence | Derbyshire Constabulary